As usual, all times Eastern and all predictions wrong.

Noon:

• Notre Dame vs. Navy (@Jacksonville, FL; CBS): I don’t think Ken Niumatalolo is really looking to leave the Naval Academy, but I’d like to think that a win here could catapult him to a major conference team. C’mon, Purdue, pick up the phone.
• Wisconsin @ Northwestern (ABC): To me, the most agonizing about thing about this game was worrying that Wisconsin could conceivably win easily and shut out Northwestern without covering.
• Vanderbilt @ Auburn (ESPN): College football, more than any other sport I can think of, can really see a team change its character over the course of 12 games, and perhaps no other team exemplifies that more than these Auburn Tigers. Seriously. I don’t see anything other than the Commodores being incinerated here.
• Louisville @ Boston College (ESPN2): Boston College won an ACC game last weekend! Yay! Enjoy it while it lasts, which isn’t much longer.
• Texas @ Texas Tech (FS1): The Longhorns defense isn’t very good, but at least it exists.
• Georgia Southern @ Mississippi (ESPNU): This Southern team isn’t enough to make Ole Miss worry this year.
• Michigan State @ Illinois (ESPNEWS): Uh, don’t watch this. I’m not really sure I want to know the answer to this question. I guess I’ll go with Sparty, though.
• Texas A&M @ Mississippi State (SEC): This Miss State team is proving that Dak Prescott may have been the greatest college football player to ever live.
• Indiana @ Rutgers (BTN): Indiana.
• Air Force @ Army (CBSS): I think Army is improved, I just don’t see this as a win for them. If they do pull it off, though, they’ll probably go bowling.

12:30:

• Pittsburgh @ Miami (ACC): Is this the game where the Hurricanes can finally get their mojo back? Really, both of these teams have been disappointing this year, especially after promising starts for each. I’m going with the ‘Canes once again, but probably not much longer if they drop this.
• Georgia Tech @ North Carolina (ACC): This Georgia Tech defense would fit in in the Pac-12. Most of the issues I have with them just come down to coaching, which has to make me think that Ted Roof is on the way out. Unfortunately, Mitch Trubisky and company have the tools more than almost any other team in the ACC not named “Clemson” or “Louisville” to really feast on our defense. The best case scenario seems to be the shootouts that have peppered this series as of late, so as is often the case in these games, I hope we get the ball last.

3:00: Virginia @ Wake Forest (ACC/RSN): There has to be some sort of prophecy about Wake Forest being okay once every ten years or something.

3:30:

• Texas Christian @ Baylor (FOX): Thank you, Texas. TCU.
• Florida @ Arkansas (CBS): Yeah, it’d be pretty fitting for one of the SEC East frontrunners to go get clobbered on the road against an SEC West team.
• Oklahoma State @ Kansas State (ABC/ESPN2): I just don’t see K-State being able to keep up here.
• Syracuse @ Clemson (ABC/ESPN2): See above, except replace “K-State” with “Syracuse”.
• Maryland @ Michigan (ESPN): Okay, so, Maryland is, like, kinda okay this year? Look for them to lose by 20 or so instead of 30+.
• Virginia Tech @ Duke (ESPNU): Boy howdy, this 3:30 slate is kind of bleak, isn’t it? This might be the most exciting game on this list, and even I’m pegging VPI has prohibitive favorites.
• Oregon State @ Stanford (FS1): I think Stanford can notch a Pac-12 win here? Maybe?
• Purdue @ Minnesota (BTN): Seriously Boilermakers, run the option. Of course, the AD you just hired sort of didn’t get along with our coach, so maybe he’ll have a prejudice against option coaches? Then again, I suspect not a lot of people get along with Paul Johnson. Oh, and yeah, Gophers.
• Brigham Young @ Cincinnati (CBSS): Tubs, you should’ve got while the gettin’ was good. Stormin’ Mormons roll.

4:00:

• Memphis @ Southern Methodist (ESPNEWS): Okay, SMU, good job on beating Houston and (maybe?) costing Tom Herman the Texas job. Wait, no, the other thing. I have Memphis here.
• Missouri @ South Carolina (SEC): I feel like if I were making a “list of unwatchable major conference football games”, this one would probably be near the top of the list. Uh, Gamecocks?
• Arizona @ Washington State (Pac12): While I’m sure it’d be wonderful to see two 8-0 in the Pac-12 squads roll into the Apple Cup, I don’t see it. I think Wazzou is going to pick up a random loss on the way, so why not here?

5:30: Florida International @ Western Kentucky (beIN): Oof. Hilltopers going to score some points, y’all.

7:00:

• Oregon @ Southern California (ESPN): USC has an upright quarterback among other things, which against this Oregon team is more than enough.
• Kansas @ West Virginia (ESPN2): The flames will rise from the couches after taking a brief break due.
• Florida State @ North Carolina State (ESPNU): I’m not going to hold losing to Boston College against NC State all that much because, hey, that happens sometimes. While I think they can offer some resistance to FSU, ultimately they’re just too much to overcome.
• Hawaii @ San Diego State (CBSS): Other than their (inexplicable) loss to the country’s best worst team (South Alabama), the Aztecs have looked good this year. Hawaii’s not as awful as past editions, but this game in particular figures to be too tough for them.

7:30:

• Georgia @ Kentucky (SEC): It would make my day if this is season where Georgia loses to both Vanderbilt and Kentucky, but, well, I just can’t predict it.
• Iowa @ Pennsylvania State (BTN): It seems about right that Penn State would drop this game coming off the big win over Ohio State.

8:00:

• Nebraska @ Ohio State (ABC): Speaking of the Buckeyes, at some point their offense has to get back on track, right? I like the odds of it happening here.
• Alabama @ Louisiana State (CBS): Okay, so it took a large man with a very heavy Cajun accent to drag LSU’s offense out of the stone age, and lo and behold, they look, well, like we all expected a properly functioning LSU offense to look. Go figure! Seriously, LSU, this is was the job DACOACHO was made for. If he doesn’t get this, I hope he gets the Arkansas job or something where he’ll play LSU every year just to spite them. That said… this Alabama team is, like, really good. I just can’t bring myself to pick against them.
• East Carolina @ Tulsa (ESPNEWS): The Alabama-LSU game is on CBS, so it’ll probably just be getting to the half when this game is starting the 4th quarter. Then again, Tulsa is pretty pass-happy, so maybe… the third quarter.

10:15:

• Utah State @ Wyoming (ESPN2): The Aggies aren’t that good this year, so if you’re asking if Wyoming can make it two in a row, I say “why not?”
• Nevada @ New Mexico (ESPNU): Did you know Bob Davie is still the head coach of New Mexico? Yeah, really! I might watch this just for that. (I also like the Lobos here.)

10:30: Washington @ California (ESPN): And finally, we get to #pac12afterdark. This one goes either one of two ways. One way is UDub comes out pissed at getting ranked 5th by the Committee and completely goes off on the Golden Bears and wins, like, 51-7. The other is that Washington starts to show some cracks, and the Bears keep it close until a few bounces go against them in the 4th quarter and the Huskies wind up winning by 10 or 14, which is a win but satisfies no one. Either way, I’m going with them.

Furthermore, Carthage must be destroyed.