Category Archives: On TV This Weekend

This Weekend in College Football: Week 11

As usual, all times Eastern and all predictions wrong.

Noon:

  • Mississippi @ Texas A&M (CBS): The popular consensus is that Week 11 is “trash”. I say, let’s see for ourselves. We start with a bad Ole Miss team against a reeling Texas A&M… yeah, TAMU should still win.
  • Ohio State @ Michigan State (FOX): Speaking of trash, just ugh. I keep thinking Ohio State has like three losses at this point, but no, it just feels that way. I guess they’ll win though?
  • Wisconsin @ Pennsylvania State (ABC): Also trash: the Big Ten West, where the winner will probably have four losses on the year by the time all is said and done. I’m taking Penn State here.
  • South Carolina @ Florida (ESPN): The Gators just got beat pretty soundly by Mizzou at home and somehow they’re still sixteenth in the country. What? It’s cool, though, they’re still less trash than South Carolina, probably.
  • Navy @ Central Florida (ESPN2): Navy is garbage this year, UCF cruises.
  • Texas Christian @ West Virginia (FS1): Any season where you lose to Kansas is rubbish, so I’m going with West Virginia here.
  • Tulsa @ Memphis (ESPNU): Tulsa is 2-7, which is a pretty refuse-worthy record.
  • Vanderbilt @ Missouri (SEC): Mizzou finally gets that elusive second SEC win.
  • Kansas @ Kansas State (FSN): The Sunflower Showdown is so garbage this year that it’s pretty likely the Jayhawks win, as the Bill Synder era at K-State continues to end in the most awkward way possible.
  • Illinois @ Nebraska (BTN): Illinois at least has the distinction of the perennially awful Big Ten team that at least has nothing otherwise awkward going on around it this year, though they’ll probably lose to Nebraska and further dash the Big Ten’s chances of filling all of its bowl slots.
  • Maryland @ Indiana (BTN): Speaking of teams the Big Ten wishes it could throw away… Indiana all the way.

12:20: North Carolina @ Duke (Raycom): Okay, so the morning slot is… mostly garbage. So let’s get past that block and go straight to… a probable rout of UNC by Duke. Great.

2:00: California-Los Angeles @ Arizona State (Pac12): Well, I would’ve guessed that one of the head coaches in this game would probably be the Pac-12 Coach of the Year (if that’s a thing, I’m assuming it’s a thing). The thing is, well, I wouldn’t have put my money on HERM, that’s for sure.

3:00: Liberty @ Virginia (ACC/RSN): I included this because Liberty is technically FBS, though they’ll probably be independent forever because they’re so radioactive that no conference wants them. And if a conference does pick them up, it would just stink of desperation.

3:30:

  • Northwestern @ Iowa (FOX): Well, this game is important in the sense that it’ll probably determine the Big Ten West champion (maybe?), so enjoy watching a game Iowa will win like 11-5 or some crap.
  • Oklahoma State @ Oklahoma (ABC): BEDLAM SAVE US DEAR GOD oh wait Oklahoma State is kinda bad this year. Sigh.
  • Mississippi State @ Alabama (CBS): Last week, I railed against the line in the Alabama-LSU game because, surely, LSU could at least, like, score once, right? Nah. Sure, LSU played some defense, but this Alabama team plays defense 95% as well as the previous editions and basically plays the kind of offense that Nick Saban said a few years ago would “ruin football” or some such. Yeah, this Bama team is just incinerating people right now.
  • Washington State @ Colorado (ESPN): Remember when the Buffs were undefeated? No? Yeah, I don’t really blame you, that was like a month ago. Since then, they’ve lost 4 straight, including to an absolute trash fire of an Oregon State team. Yeesh. Wazzu will probably blow one at some point, but predicting when is folly.
  • Purdue @ Minnesota (ESPN2): That Minnesota win over Fresno State continues to get weirder and weirder. Meanwhile, Purdue got their mojo back with a win over Iowa, further ensuring their position somewhere near the top of the Big Ten West garbage heap. I’ll take the Boilermakers, which, with the way this schedule is shaping up, could well be a double entrendre before this day is out.
  • Baylor @ Iowa State (FS1): I am so tired, y’all. The way this is going, I may as well reel in some sleep debt and just sleep until the Tech game starts at 4:00 my time. Uh, Cyclones?
  • Kentucky @ Tennessee (SEC): Ugh, Kentucky is still ranked 12 and they’re kind of terrible? Anyway, Tennessee is worse, so…
  • Michigan @ Rutgers (BTN): Do you know what the line is on this game? No, higher. No, just a bit more. Close… okay yeah it’s Michigan by 38. I’ll take the Wolverines to cover. New Jersey remains our trashiest state. Since no one is reading this anyway, allow me to regale you with one of my favorite bits from Futurama (warning: may be paraphrased a bit):

    [Montage of Fry looking for apartments]
    Fry: This place is great! What’s the catch?
    Agent: Well… we’re technically in New Jersey.
    [Cut back to Planet Express]
    Fry: Not a single livable place!

  • New Mexico @ Air Force (CBSS): These teams are both trash this year, but Air Force is slightly less so.

4:00: East Carolina @ Tulane (ESPNEWS): ECU figures to be 0-6 in the AAC after this one.

5:30: Oregon @ Utah (Pac12): Hey, an interesting game, except unless you’re on the West Coast like me you probably can’t see it. Alas and alack. I’ll take the Utes.

7:00:

  • Auburn @ Georgia (ESPN): It’s the Deep South’s Oldest Rivalry (I missed the South’s Oldest Rivalry a couple weeks ago, sorry Carolina-Virginia fans) once again, and UGA is unfortunately a prohibitive favorite. I don’t know how they’ll do it, but as usual I’m hoping for something weird to happen. Anyway, I probably won’t see any of this because…
  • Miami @ Georgia Tech (ESPN2): HEY WE GOT A HOME NIGHT GAME, WOOOO. So we’ve done what we needed to the past couple weeks to try to salvage this season, but nonetheless two things remain to be seen. The first is, how much longer can the offense continue to essentially pound Tobias Oliver into defenses over and over again? TaQuon Marshall did start against UNC last week, but he still looked hurt and Oliver played most of the game. But there’s no doubt that Oliver does not have the same freedom to operate that Marshall does, and I can’t help but think at some point defenses will gear up to stop him. Also, Miami posses the most capable defense we’ve played since Clemson. (Yes, VPI has Bud Foster, but they’re so thin this year that not even Bud can save them.) Not only are they likely to be more schematically sound than Louisville or UNC, but they also have the second best athletes on our schedule. While I don’t think Miami has the same caliber of player Clemson does, they’re close than anyone else and that’s how they’ve beat us eight of the last nine times. I also suspect that Mark Richt will not gift us any touchdowns via failed onside kicks this year. The second thing is, between injury and inconsistency Richt is having a devil of a time finding a quarterback. Can the Georgia Tech defense finally get stops that aren’t fueled by turnovers? Passing defense, especially on third downs, has been atrocious. One more thing: it’s going to be cold in Atlanta Saturday night, with a game time forecast calling for 40 degrees and dropping.
  • South Florida @ Cincinnati (ESPNU): USF decided to show they were garbage after appearing not garbage for a large chunk of the season, but after two consecutive blowouts by Houston (understandable) and Tulane (less so), I have to go with Cincy here.

7:30:

  • Florida State @ Notre Dame (NBC): FSU is garbage this year, and Notre Dame should be able to beat them at home with their backup quarterback.
  • Texas @ Texas Tech (FOX): Yeah, looking back Texas Tech’s best win might well be beating Houston at home back in September. But they do have the advantage of it being night in Lubbock with a demoralized set of Longhorns… yeah, I’m still picking Texas.
  • Louisiana State @ Arkansas (SEC): Arkansas’s defense is a tire fire, to the extent that LSU might even be able to score on them.
  • Southern Mississippi @ Alabama-Birmingham (beIN): Go Blazers!

8:00: Clemson @ Boston College (ABC): Yes, Boston College is, uh, good, but evidence that they can beat Clemson is… scarce. But here we are with Gameday in Chestnut Hill because Week 11 is, say with with me now, trash.

9:00: Oregon State @ Stanford (Pac12): I suppose every conference has to have one team you look forward to playing, and in the case of the Pac-12, that team is Oregon State.

10:30:

  • California @ Southern California (ESPN): Anyone still reading this? Sorry I’ve been so sarcastic this week, I don’t know what it is, really. I tell y’all what, I’ll predict an upset for once: the Bears are totally going to win this game. I mean, I know I’m not entirely going out on a limb here, since I half expected to look up the line and be genuinely surprised that Cal is actually favored or something. (As is, it’s USC by 5.)
  • Nevada-Las Vegas @ San Diego State (ESPN2): UNLV is bad. SDSU isn’t.
  • Colorado State @ Nevada (ESPNU): Nevada.

This Weekend in College Football: Week 10

I’m out of town this weekend and will probably miss many, if not most, of these games! Despite that, let’s do our thing, though with a pretty heavy dose of LIGHTNING ROUND.

As usual, all times Eastern and all predictions wrong.

Noon:

  • Nebraska @ Ohio State (FOX): Well, Scott Frost day came and went, which is good because this figures to put the Cornhuskers back on the schnide.
  • Louisville @ Clemson (ABC): Louisville’s defense is… really, really bad. This will get ugly.
  • Texas A&M @ Auburn (ESPN): The Internet angst regarding Gus Malzahn is really something, which will be really confusing when the Tigers win. Well, provided they can figure something, anything on offense.
  • Michigan State @ Maryland (ESPN2): Sparty.
  • Oklahoma State @ Baylor (FS1): Pokes.
  • Memphis @ East Carolina (ESPNU): Tigers.
  • South Carolina @ Mississippi (SEC): Gamecocks.
  • Iowa State @ Kansas (FSN): Cyclones.
  • Rutgers @ Wisconsin (BTN): Do I really even need to specify for this one?
  • Air Force @ Army (CBSS): Army begins its Commander-in-Chief’s Trophy run with this game, which at the rate they’ve been going this year they should handle easily.
  • Syracuse @ Wake Forest (ACC/RSN): One of the great current mysteries of this college football season is: “Is Syracuse actually good? And why are they ranked?” So suffice it to say, they need to be Wake so we can keep asking ourselves that question.

12:15: Georgia Tech @ North Carolina (Raycom): After beating VPI last week, there’s an uptick in optimism surrounding Georgia Tech. The maddening thing about this season, though, has been the inconsistency. Even in the Virginia Tech game it looked like it was going to be a track meet before they muffed that punt. The main thing I will be watching here is the defense, and whether or not we can consistently get stops. The offense, of course, bears mentioning. They played lights out with Oliver in and while I think Marshall is a superior all-around QB, Oliver’s lack of hesitancy (in fairness, this is due to a simplified playbook with less reads) has made a lot of difference. If we want to have any hope of going bowling this season, this game is a must-win, full stop. It is hard to see how we will get in otherwise, and even then…

3:30:

  • Florida State @ North Carolina State (ABC): It’s been a rough couple of weeks for the Wolfpack, and while FSU has looked better I don’t think they’ve looked that much better.
  • Georgia @ Kentucky (CBS): Georgia looked a little bit more like themselves against Florida, and all they need to do is sustain that against a pesky Kentucky team. If they can get their offense rolling at all, Kentucky won’t be able to keep up with them.
  • West Virginia @ Texas (FOX): So Texas got everyone back in and re-invested, and then they went out and lost to Oklahoma State. Whoops! And now you have a pain-in-the-neck Mountaineer team that could definitely still make their way to the Big 12 title game (which, yes, is a thing again for some reason) and all sorts of problems. I’ll go with the Horns here, but sheesh nothing is easy with those guys.
  • Iowa @ Purdue (ESPN2): Iowa?
  • Kansas State @ Texas Christian (FS1): This looks to be it for Bill Synder, but the problem with a coach like that is that he very much wants to go out on his own terms.
  • Navy @ Cincinnati (ESPNU): Cincy was probably smoke-and-mirrors, running out to that undefeated start, but Navy has just been not good this year.
  • Minnesota @ Illinois (BTN): Minnesota?
  • Tulane @ South Florida (CBSS): USF.

3:45:

  • Pennsylvania State @ Michigan (ESPN): This finally looks like the year Michigan will finish above third in the Big Ten East. All they have to do is not screw this up. Which, well, I don’t blame you for being nervous, but by all rights this year’s Wolverines should beat this year’s Nittany Lions.
  • Boston College @ Virginia Tech (Raycom): This game figures to be, uh, low-scoring. And I’m taking BC.

4:00:

  • Missouri @ Florida (SEC): Mizzou is 0-4 in the SEC, and by all rights they should be 2-2. Such is life, and probably losing in the Swamp.
  • Utah @ Arizona State (Pac12): Arizona State is 4-4 and no one knows what to do, which is a good time for the Utes to swoop in and remind them who really rules the roost in the Pac-12 South these days (since USC continues to be AWOL).

7:00:

  • Duke @ Miami (ESPN2): Miami is sort of not good, but I don’t care how good Duke is, I don’t see them out-atheleting Miami.
  • Houston @ Southern Methodist (ESPNU): Houston.
  • Connecticut @ Tulsa (CBSS): Tulsa?

7:15: Notre Dame @ Northwestern (ESPN): I’m picking Notre Dame here, not because I like the Irish (I certainly don’t), but having a division leader be 5-1 in conference and 5-4 on the year will surely deepen the existential crisis in the Big Ten offices.

7:30:

  • California-Los Angeles @ Oregon (FOX): Speaking of the Utes causing crashes back down to Earth, Chip Kelly’s little two-game win streak got a rude awakening by the Utes. And now they head up to Eugene, Chip’s old stomping grounds, and a Ducks team that really themselves will be looking to get back on the ball. This could get ugly.
  • Louisiana Tech @ Mississippi State (SEC): Miss State.
  • Texas-San Antonio @ Alabama-Birmingham (beIN): Go Blazers!
  • Florida Atlantic @ Florida International (Stadium): Yep, welcome to the loathsome universe where it turns out the reason that Lane Kiffin was fun and good at FAU was because Kendall Briles was his offensive coordinator last year. Taking FIU here.

8:00:

  • Alabama @ Louisiana State (CBS): This game is nuts. As I said elsewhere, these are the #1 and #3 teams in the country and the spread is Alabama by two touchdowns on the road, in Death Valley, at night. This is nuts. But then again, everything about Alabama’s season so far is nuts. Even more nuts might be to bet against them, but… I’d probably still take LSU to cover. It’s almost inconceivable. Fourteen points!
  • Oklahoma @ Texas Tech (ABC): In the meantime, the Red Raiders are having themselves a nice little season, and stranger things have happened in Lubbock but… Oklahoma is real good, y’all.

9:00: Stanford @ Washington (Pac12): Remember when the Pac-10/12 was a fun conference, full of teams that liked to throw it all over the place? Yeah, if that’s what you’re nostalgic for then stay far, far away from this game. Which, in fairness, will probably be pretty easy since you don’t live on the West coast and probably don’t get DirecTV. Anyway, I’ll take UDub.

10:00: Southern California @ Oregon State (FS1): Oregon State did beat Colorado somehow, and the Trojans are reeling, but yeah, I’m going with USC here.

10:15:

  • Brigham Young @ Boise State (ESPN2): BYU just lost 7-6 to Northern Illinois, so I will go with Boise here.
  • San Diego State @ New Mexico (ESPNU): Aztecs.

10:30: Fresno State @ Nevada-Las Vegas (CBSS): Bulldogs.

10:45: California @ Washington State (ESPN): How in the world did Cal beat UDub? You know what, don’t tell me, I don’t want to know. Going with Wazzu.

 

This Weekend in College Football: Week 9

As usual, all times Eastern and all predictions wrong.

Noon:

  • Wisconsin @ Northwestern (FOX): In a reminder that, perhaps, the Big Ten West isn’t very good, this is a match of two potential contenders! Okay, sure, most folks expected the Badgers to be here, but nonetheless Northwestern has been arguably just as good. Wisconsin may also be down a quarterback, but it’s not like Alex Hornibrook has been awesome anyway. I’ll stick with the Badgers.
  • Clemson @ Florida State (ABC): FSU’s gotten better as the year has gone on, but it’s still hard to see this as anything other than a Clemson rout.
  • Purdue @ Michigan State (ESPN): Welcome to Hangover Saturday, Purdue! Arguably, both Purdue and Wazzu will get matchups this weekend that are probably the teams you’d least like to play after scoring a potential program-defining win. In particular, I don’t like the Boilermakers’ odds having to venture up to East Lansing.
  • Texas Tech @ Iowa State (ESPN2): For two games in a row, Iowa State has shut down some pretty good offenses, or at least managed to outscore them themselves. I’ll go ahead and favor them here.
  • Massachusetts @ Connecticut (ESPNU): You could watch this, but just don’t. UConn I guess?
  • Vanderbilt @ Arkansas (SEC): Neither of these teams have been especially competitive in SEC play, but the Razorbacks have arguably looked worse, so I’ll go with the ‘Dores.
  • Army @ Eastern Michigan (CBSS): Army all the way.
  • Wake Forest @ Louisville (ACC/RSN): Wake all the way.

12:20: North Carolina @ Virginia (Raycom): UVA is good, or at least, improved this season. For Carolina, it’s been disappointing, even considering they weren’t expected to be good to begin with. I’m going with the Cavs here.

3:00:

  • Texas Christian @ Kansas (FS1): I guess these two oddly timed games are trying to convince people to tune in during commercial breaks during the later games? I dunno, seems pretty desperate. TCU should be able to get back to .500 here.
  • Oregon State @ Colorado (Pac12): Oregon State is a pretty good salve for a team that’s gone from 5-0 to 5-2.

3:30:

  • Kansas State @ Oklahoma (FOX): Hard to see this year’s K-State putting up much resistance versus Kyler Murray and company.
  • Florida vs. Georgia (@Jacksonville, FL; CBS): Well, here we are. My main take on this game is that predicting either team would be in the position they’re currently would’ve been very difficult as recently as a few weeks ago. Florida has gotten here by guile. They blew out Tennessee, sure, but their other games were nail-biters and they got the win over LSU. Georgia blew out everyone and looked otherwise like they weren’t stoppin’ till the SEC Championship, but they derailed—big time—in Baton Rouge. It wasn’t just that they lose to LSU, it’s that it wasn’t really much of a content. So how do you read this one? Will Georgia’s offense wilt once again against a legitimately good defense? If that does happen, can Florida’s offense hang around long enough to get some breaks and score some points? That’s the scenario I’m going with, but really no outcome in this game would surprise me.
  • South Florida @ Houston (ABC/ESPN2): Here’s a somewhat under-the-radar G5 game that could determine the P5 bowl game rep, much less the AAC champion. I’m going against the Internet grain and picking USF here.
  • Arizona State @ Southern California (ABC/ESPN2): I have no idea what’s going on with USC, and most people don’t either, but have they considered Arizona State might be just what the Trojans need right now?
  • Iowa @ Pennsylvania State (ESPN): With two conference losses, Penn State is probably not a factor in the East anymore, but what they do here could go a long way toward untangling the West. But boy howdy, Iowa’s actually looked… good? It’s weird. These are two teams going different directions right now, and I’m taking Iowa on the road.
  • Northern Illinois @ Brigham Young (ESPNU): NIU?
  • Illinois @ Maryland (BTN): Maryland.
  • Cincinnati @ Southern Methodist (CBSS): Cincy.
  • Duke @ Pittsburgh (ACC/RSN): Duke.

4:00: Kentucky @ Missouri (SEC): Here’s your hipster college football pick of the week. Mizzou can score points but doesn’t play a lot of defense, Kentucky does the opposite. Usually this favors the team that’s good at defense, so that’s what I’m going to go with.

6:30: Washington @ California (FS1): UDub.

7:00:

  • Texas A&M @ Mississippi State (ESPN): TAMU isn’t exactly striking fear into anyone’s hearts, but Miss State just has so many problems on offense right now it’s hard to go with them.
  • North Carolina State @ Syracuse (ESPN2): Speaking of hangover games, NC State sure did get obliterated by Clemson last weekend, eh? And again, Syracuse is probably who you won’t want to play, but I certainly favor the Wolfpack in this situation.
  • Tulane @ Tulsa (ESPNU): Tulane?
  • Boise State @ Air Force (CBSS): Boise.
  • Washington State @ Stanford (Pac12): And here we go. Are you for real, Wazzu? I sure hope so. If you’re hungover, this is like trying to distract from that pounding headache with by taking a brick to the face.

7:30:

  • Tennessee @ South Carolina (SEC):  Lightning round! Gamecocks.
  • Florida International @ Western Kentucky (beIN): FIU?

8:00:

  • Texas @ Oklahoma State (ABC): Hey Texas, you for real? They’ve got a good chance to keep it real and ride all the way to the Big 12 championship, but they’ve got to win games like this.
  • Notre Dame vs. Navy (@San Diego, CA; CBS): This isn’t even an especially feisty version of Navy, so yeah, Notre Dame should roll.

10:30:

  • Oregon @ Arizona (ESPN): Oregon.
  • Hawaii @ Fresno State (ESPN2): Fresno.
  • San Diego State @ Nevada (ESPNU): SDSU.

This Weekend in College Football: Week 8

Man, if last week was Blood Week, then this is ugh week.

Okay, look, I’m sorry, come back. It’s been a long week over here at ASimSports HQ and this edition will be quicker than usual. Bowl prediction season is coming up soon, and they will debut either next week or the week after depending on how much time I have.

As usual, all times Eastern and all predictions wrong.

Noon:

  • Oklahoma @ Texas Christian (ABC): The Sooners figure to be able to bounce back against a TCU team that looks kind of mediocre at this point.
  • Michigan @ Michigan State (FOX): No one should watch that game, which means… everyone is going to be watching to see what wacky thing goes down in this game. Are the conditions going to be right? Let’s check the forecast for kickoff: 49°F, rain, wind 13mph out of the WNW. Then consider the line is Michigan by 7.5. Take Sparty and the under if you’re putting on this, but I have Michigan straight up, allowing Harbaugh to get to 2-2 against Michigan State.
  • Auburn @ Mississippi (ESPN): Auburn still has a decent defense, but their ability to score points is under some doubt. Ole Miss, of course, has the opposite problem. What will happen when they meet? Who knows, but I have Auburn.
  • Maryland @ Iowa (ESPN2): I think I have Iowa here.
  • Illinois @ Wisconsin (FS1): Badgers.
  • Cincinnati @ Temple (ESPNU): Hey, maybe watch this instead! The continuing quest to see who will finish behind UCF in the AAC continues, but Cincy is sneakily undefeated! I mean, it’s because they pretty much haven’t played anyone, but still. I’ll take them to remain so in their first true test.
  • Tulsa @ Arkansas (SEC): Arkansas?
  • Northwestern @ Rutgers (BTN): I’ve run out of things to say about Rutgers. They will somehow top themselves and go down as the worst major conference team in history.
  • Miami @ Army (CBSS): Army appears to be… good? Yeah, I know.

12:20: North Carolina @ Syracuse (Raycom): ‘Cuse.

12:30: Virginia @ Duke (ACC/RSN): I don’t think Duke is good, I just think we might be terrible. I still like them better than Virginia.

3:30:

  • Colorado @ Washington (FOX): Huh, are the Buffs still undefeated? Oh, they lost to USC last weekend, that makes sense. Okay, good, because they’re probably about to get pummeled by a mad UDub team.
  • Pennsylvania State @ Indiana (ABC): After facing two good defenses, the Hoosiers will be a welcome sight for the Nittany Lions.
  • Alabama @ Tennessee (CBS): It is very definitely the Third Saturday in October. However, all you need to know about this Alabama team is that their fans are stressing because they might have to start their backup quarterback. Which, in fairness, is a worry for many teams. But most teams don’t have a quarterback that has won a national championship as their backup, and most teams haven’t been so efficient this season that Jalen Hurts, said backup, has compiled the following stat line as he has played in every game: 37 for 50 passing (74%) for 568 yards (11.36 yards per attempt), 5 TD, 1 INT. This is dumb and everything is pointless.
  • North Carolina State @ Clemson (ESPN): “NC State is good this year”, I say. “Who have they played?” you say. Yeah, I’ll take Clemson here.
  • Wake Forest @ Florida State (ESPN2): Let’s see, this Wake team is fresh off losing 63-3 to Clemson. FSU just suffered an emotional 28-27 loss to Miami. Which, in fairness, Miami looked like the better team throughout, but still. So this could go several ways, but let’s revel like the heathen kings of old (by which I mean, 10 years ago) and go with Wake.
  • Kansas @ Texas Tech (FS1): Kansas: not as bad as Rutgers! Someone should make that a t-shirt. Anyway, Red Raiders all the way here.
  • Southern Methodist @ Tulane (ESPNU): A battle of 2-4 teams on an ESPN. Yeah, it’s a week with a lot of byes, all right. Going purely with helmet designs as a measure of quality, I’m going with Tulane.
  • Minnesota @ Nebraska (BTN): The Big Ten’s two most hyped coaching hires of the past two seasons face-off with a combined record of 3-9. Oof. But what the heck, I’ll take the Huskers to get on the board. Happy Scott Frost Day, oh, and if you’re feeling chair-itable, then head this way.
  • Houston @ Navy (CBSS): While Army is on an upswing this year, Navy isn’t. Going with Houston.

4:00:

  • Memphis @ Missouri (SEC): After Bama gets up 35-0 on the Vols after the first quarter, switch to the SEC network and see if Mizzou can hold on against Memphis. My bet is that they probably can, but it figures to be more interesting, at least.
  • California @ Oregon State (Pac12): Oregon State is such a nonentity to me right now that I can’t even conceive of what I might say about them, so let’s do at least a tad of research… ah, they’re 1-5 with nary a FBS win. A crappy Arizona team beat them 35-14. Yeah, I’ll take Cal.

7:00:

  • Mississippi State @ Louisiana State (ESPN): LSU, just get through this and please only go into that game against Alabama with just 1-loss and secure that 8:00 PM CBS double-header slot. You may be our only hope.
  • Central Florida @ East Carolina (ESPN2): UCF.
  • Connecticut @ South Florida (CBSS): USF.

7:30:

  • Oregon @ Washington State (FOX): You’ve heard about the Gameday thing. You know that Pullman is kind of a weird place anyway, and this time of year it’ll be plenty dark by 7:30. For as potentially boring as all the early games may be today, this one may be completely bonkers and worth it. I have to take Wazzu here.
  • Ohio State @ Purdue (ABC): Buckeyes.
  • Fresno State @ New Mexico (ESPNU): Fresno.
  • Vanderbilt @ Kentucky (SEC): Kentucky?
  • North Texas @ Alabama-Birmingham (beIN): Go Blazers.

8:00: Southern California @ Utah (Pac12): If no one has done it already, I should register isuscbackornot.com because, well, I think they might be back?

10:30:

  • Arizona @ California-Los Angeles (ESPN2): Hopefully that Oregon-Wazzu game lives up to the billing, because this is all we’ve got for #Pac12AfterDark this week and just, ugh. UCLA I guess?
  • San Jose State @ San Diego State (CBSS): Aztecs.

This Weekend in College Football: Week 7

As usual, all times Eastern and all predictions wrong.

Noon:

  • Nebraska @ Northwestern (ABC): The forecast for Scott Frost’s first win as Nebraska’s head coach looks cloudy. But hey, how about a distraction?
  • Florida @ Vanderbilt (ESPN): I guess Florida is good? Or at least okay? Definitely better than Vandy, though.
  • Iowa @ Indiana (ESPN2): There’s a Hooiser fan out there somewhere is mad that Kentucky now has both a good football team and basketball team, while Indiana arguably has neither.
  • Minnesota @ Ohio State (FS1): Buckeyes.
  • Oklahoma State @ Kansas State (ESPNU): Sooners.
  • Tennessee @ Auburn (SEC): Hey, uh, TIgers, um, what are you doing? Everyone’s worried about y’all. The thing you’re supposed to be good at is offense, and you are not good at it this year! I had to momentarily stop to think “hey, wait a second, Tennessee might beat them”. I mean, they probably won’t, but boy howdy that’s where we’re at with Auburn right now.
  • Rutgers @ Maryland (BTN): I wonder if at the Big Ten conference offices this is known as the Regret Bowl. Did the conference ultimately benefit at all from adding these teams? I’m sure they did, but still. Anyway, Terps roll.
  • Akron @ Buffalo (CBSS): Speaking of MAC teams that have beaten Rutgers by 29 points, Bulls roll.

12:20: Duke @ Georgia Tech (Raycom): Okay, so now we know exactly how bad Louisville is (real bad). We also know how badly Paul Johnson hates traveling defensive coordinator Brian Van Gorder (real bad). That said, or defense still looks… well, I won’t say “real bad”, but you get the idea. That said, I just hope we acquit ourselves against the Blue Devils better than we did last year.

12:30: Louisville @ Boston College (ACC/RSN): Boston College might try to see if they can break the 600 yard rushing mark that we couldn’t quite get to last week. (We probably would’ve hit it, except we were down a possession in the fourth quarter due to a 95-yard pick-six.)

2:30: Pittsburgh @ Notre Dame (NBC): In case you don’t know, the corner of the Internet I hang out in has been calling Pitt to upset Notre Dame all year. So, here were are. Go Panthers.

3:30:

  • Georgia @ Louisiana State (CBS): At least Georgia and Bama will play in the SEC Championship this year.
  • Washington @ Oregon (ABC/ESPN2): Hey, Pac-12 you finally got a marquee game on in the daytime! Good job! Oh, wait, nevermind, you’re doing a reverse mirror with two AAC teams. Wonderful, great. At any rate, this should be a cracker of the game, even though I think Washington’s defense will allow it to prevail. But, that said, with it being at Autzen, I kinda wish it was at night, you know?
  • Central Florida @ Memphis (ABC/ESPN2): I’m mostly joking above because this should also be a cracker of a game. The rest of the G5 world is sort of waiting for UCF to lose, sort in the same way most of the P5 world is waiting for Alabama, Georgia, or Ohio State to lose. In the G5 scenario, it’s a bit more dire because until they lose UCF are massive favorites to return to a New Year’s Day bowl game. So, with that, I expect them to continue to prevail.
  • Baylor @ Texas (ESPN): TEXAS IS BACK. Well, okay, maybe. I mean, they’ve beaten Oklahoma before and had it not being particularly indicative of anything, which still seems like the more likely scenario. The real test are games like this, which Texas should win.
  • Purdue @ Illinois (FS1): Purdue: who knows? But hey, they’ll beat Illinois.
  • Army vs. San Jose State (@Santa Clara, CA; ESPNU): Do you know the way to… the northern reaches of Santa Clara? Yeah, not as catchy as the original, but hey if they wanna play in the Bay Area’s soulless NFL stadium, well, I guess it works just as well as getting blown out by Army in Spartan CEFCU Stadium.
  • Texas A&M @ South Carolina (SEC): Texas A&M went out and ruined a good thing (that is, Kentucky’s undefeated season). This game figures to be… really boring, honestly. Neither team is exactly full of offensive savants, and for the second week in a row it figures to pretty damp in Columbia, SC. So, I’m going with the Aggies, I guess?
  • Michigan State @ Pennsylvania State (BTN): I actually still do have BTN, but I still just have it in standard definition. Will this be the one time a year I watch it for an extended period? Honestly, I figure no, because I don’t think the Spartans are really that good, whereas Penn State was still a few plays away from being a Top-5 team.
  • Temple @ Navy (CBSS): Navy didn’t just lose to Air Force last week, they lost 35-7. That’s… bad. I’m going with Temple here.

7:00:

  • Missouri @ Alabama (ESPN): (*distant clap of thunder*) LIGHTNING ROUND! Bama.
  • Miami @ Virginia (ESPN2): Miami.
  • West Virginia @ Iowa State (FS1): Unless something weird happens ’cause AMES AFTER DARK, WVU all the way.
  • Virginia Tech @ North Carolina (ESPNU): VPI.
  • Houston @ East Carolina (CBSS): Cougars.
  • California-Los Angeles @ California (Pac12): UCLA. (Yes, you read that correctly.)

7:30:

  • Wisconsin @ Michigan (ABC): I guess I really should drop of LIGHTNING ROUND (*thunder noises*) for this game, but I mean… there’s not a whole lot of evidence that Wisconsin will be able to beat any of the Big Three Big Ten East teams this year, which is bad because they both have this and Penn State on the road. I mean, geez, you can see this scenario playing out now, right? Some bounces go the wrong way, and suddenly the Badgers have 2 or 3 conference losses and things get dicey. So as to not put too fine a point on this, but Wisconsin really needs to win this game. And honestly, I don’t think they will. (*thunder noises*) LET CHAOS REIGN IN THE BIG TEN WEST (“The Immigrant Song” begins playing out of nowhere)
  • Mississippi @ Arkansas (SEC): So, yeah, the Big Ten is the land of gray winter skies, snow, and beer. Add in a good portion of the population being of Scandinavian descent, and you have college football’s most metal conference. The SEC, well, the SEC is a lot of things, but I think most would agree metal isn’t one of them. And this game is about as far from metal as you can get. Anyway, Ole Miss should win this game for the first time since 2013.
  • Middle Tennessee State @ Florida International (beIN): MTSU figures to seize control of the CUSA East in this one.

10:15: Hawaii @ Brigham Young (ESPN2): Hey y’all, Hawaii is 6-1 and fun again. You should watch them, they figure to win!

10:30:

  • Colorado @ Southern California (FS1): Did you know the Buffs are 5-0? While it’s tough to pick them on the road, USC has, shall we say, vastly underperformed this year, so what the heck, let’s put the Pac-12 South into full chaos mode and go with Colorado here.
  • Wyoming @ Fresno State (ESPNU): Yeah, Wyoming’s not good this year.
  • Boise State @ Nevada (CBSS): Boise was knocked off their perch with a loss to San Diego State last weekend, but the Aztecs themselves are pretty good. They’re probably out of contention of the New Year’s Six spot, but they should still beat Nevada.